Chapter 11 (Part 2)

Our kidnappers then proceeded to grab us and hoist us over their shoulders like a troublesome sack of potatoes. Really this is no way to treat a delicate lady like me.

Not that you’re in any way delicate.

 Where did that voice come from? And why did it sound suspiciously like Noirxus?

“I am a delicate lady,” I managed to whisper indignantly albeit weakly. They didn’t grace that comment with an answer, not that I expected any. Although being ignored is not pleasant, there really is no point in answering. And for my sake, I wanted their kidnapping to be successful so I was as cooperative as possible.

 

Rascielle had something different in mind. She began to fight like her life depended on it. Somewhere during her fiasco, she fell from her captor’s shoulder and landed on the floor with a dull thud all the while struggling against the thin wires that bound her helpless. Her cool-headed captor mechanically placed a gag in her mouth followed by a whispered string of death threats.

Ah death threats, I thought fondly. It’s the standard protocol for your run-of-the-mill kidnappings and hostage takings. I may not know the step by step procedure on how to execute the perfect crime but I do know that death threats or threats in general, are the all-time, multi-purpose, 75% chance of success solution, in any given situation, to getting your way just the way you like it – I mean, getting incredibly good bargain deals. Warning to avid shoppers: try at your own risk – results may vary.

To be honest, his threats are not that bad, dare I say well even because Rascielle’s reaction was immediate. She was petrified with fear and not even a squeal came out of her as he none too gently picked her up again.

“Should we blindfold them?” the one carrying me asked his partner.

“Never mind that. Honestly, you don’t need a blindfold to where we’re going. The problem is finding a toilet,” his partner answered.

I raised a questioning eyebrow. A toilet?

“What do you need a toilet for?” I asked out of curiosity.

“Yes, my lady, that’s a very good question indeed. What exactly do you need a toilet for, eh?” the one holding me replied sarcastically. Even though all I can see is his backside, I can feel him sneering at me. That is simply unacceptable!

“You’re expecting me to believe that you need a toilet break in the middle of a kidnapping? Asking for a toilet in this situation, if you’re not the victim, is highly suspicious!” I growled back, feeling highly indignant.

 

“That’s true,” the second one answered as he shifted Rascielle weight on his shoulders to open the doors in the room. A huge walk in closet full of feminine under garments greeted him when he opened the first door. He looked away and immediately closed the offending room behind him. “Honestly, I guess you’ll just see when we find it.”

He walked to the second door and found the empty hallway and immediately but silently closed it. Then he walked to the third and last door and successfully found the bathroom. The two entered the bathroom like they owned the place, confidence coloring their every step.

My captor let out an astonished whistle. “If it weren’t for this darned mission, I’d be totally carving out that jewel encrusted toilet paper holder and selling it!”

“Honestly, can’t you be more dignified than that? For that statement alone, I think you should go first,” his partner said smugly.

“No. I went first last time. You go first!” he argued back.

“Honestly,” he shook his head disapprovingly. “You are such a baby. You need to go first because you’re holding the portal powder, imbecile”

“If I’m such a baby then why don’t you get the portal powder from my pocket and go first?! In the first place, why did it have to be a freaking toilet?!”

I laughed quietly and couldn’t help adding, “You are both immature babies.”

My captor tensed when he heard that and then proceeded laughing back. “I have an idea. Why don’t we let my lady go first?”

“Honestly, that’s your best idea yet,” he smirked arrogantly.

With renewed vigor, they both marched purposefully to the toilet. My captor shifted his weight to awkwardly pull a small pouch from his pocket. It was a small leather pouch sealed with a simple drawstring. With one hand, he shook the pouch open and poured its contents, which seemed like sparkling gold glitter powder, into the toilet bowl. A small whirlpool started to stir the water in the bowl.

“Alright my lady, down you go,” my captor said patiently as he began to grab my ankles and dangle me head, or rather hair, first into the golden tinged swirling vortex of toilet water goodness.

To summarize my reaction to such sheer indecency, intense humiliation and utter disgust to the situation – I shrieked loudly, “My HAIR!!”

“Please don’t forget to take a deep breath and calmly wait for us on the other side,” he continued as if I didn’t say anything.

And then he dropped me…into the toilet.